Thursday, April 8, 2010

The Geekiest Post In History (or most redundant..)

Okay. Blame it on Plinkett. The Zoidberg-like voiced ne'er do wrong of RedLetterMedia's hilariously on point Star Wars Prequels reviews. For those unfamiliar with what I just said, watch on..

For The Rest (Including the all-new Episode II Review!)

The man has essentially piqued my good roomie's curiosity to finally get her first crack at these gargantuan pieces of cinematic carrion to see what the old psycho was talking about. And unexpectedly, she didn't loathe on them nearly as much as many of us did upion their initial run. Especially with the climactic chapter. Episode III: Revenge Of The Sith where she was relatively affected by it. Now it must be said that she is a very astute and often extremely observant film fan. But her views on the quality of these films comes from more personal connections to what was happening internally, as opposed to all the political shenanigans happening all over the place resulting in gobs of unnecessary digital waste.Just glad to see these films through the eyes of someone who never grew up with the original films, and therefore no context to how it felt to have a singular large event myth like that unfold over the course of seven years.

This all considered, going back into these films reminded me so much of not only what Mr. Plinkett said in his sprawling reviews, but also helped me remember what I personally wished to have seen in the third, and most crucial installment of the Fall of Anakin Skywalker.

Particularly, the rushed, underimagined/executed finale. Goodness help me, I'm resorting to redundant Star Wars suggestions on my blog.

Let's get to it, shall we?

1) The Murder of The Younglings:

Now this sequence has always troubled me as a most obvious point of contention when talking Anakin's sudden turn to the Dark Side. So many have tried to overuse the tired, lazy excuse that he was obsessed with saving Padme Amidala to the point that he would easily be Palpatine's drone at this point.

Seriously now. If I were lucid enough to exclaim, "what have I done?", I'd still stand by the idea that I had some kind of say in what it is I'd do exactly, versus what I wouldn't. Which is why I always found his killing of children to have no real basis in simple human behavior, lest this character was either possessed or a psycho from the getgo. Personaly speaking, I would have created a reason for this to happen. A means to push Anakin into this heinous act. Being accidentally discovered by a little Jedi in training seems to make a great deal more sense. The child/children being discovered peeping would add much needed tension to the scene, and further make Anakin's actions a little more understandable. (not that swinging a laser-sword into a large group of kids is, really. Even if there are days when we fantasize about it.)

2) Obi-Wan, You Jerk:

Now this one isn't so much about story so much as it is about character. Now personally, if I had come to the end of a 20-plus year friendship that ended so ugly, and I truly felt that my companion's pain of being multi-amputated, burned from top-to-bottom, I'd at least end his pain by decapitating him. Just leaving Anakin's burnt, writhing carcass laying on a hill is a bit of a cold move on Obi-Wan's part. Again, I guess I'd rather that Anakin had fallen into an unreachable crevasse where Obi-Wan could not see him. This would allow Obi-Wan to deliver his "you were the chosen one!" lines as more of a soliloqy, never knowing of Anakin's anguished state before leaving to get Padme."I raised you like a son. We grew together as practically brothers. And now you turn against all that is good in the galaxy, until soon this happens. Shit. That looks painful. Later!"

3) Losing The Will To Live (!?):

Again. I'm almost certain I'm not the first person to have suggested this, but the incredible negligence to allow the medical droid to utter the line " We are losing her...She's lost the will to live." is so beyond frustrating that it begs to be reconsidered and reshot. When in only a few minutes before, Padme had expressed her shock and dismay at the revelations that her beloved Anakin had become a traitor & mass murderer. To which his perturbed response was only to pull a "force choke" on her briefly while exclaiming that Obi-Wan had turned her against him only to release it seconds later. The ensuing damage,while potentially traumatizing in no way constitutes anything life-threatening.

-And this is where an idea germinated within me...(combined with what we recalled in Return Of The Jedi, when Luke asks Leia about her memories of mother-To which she replies that she remembers her vaguely. Recollections of a person, beautiful and kind, but sad...)

Now...this is where a big suggestion falls into place that at least to me seems more in keeping with continuity, and could have thrown viewers into some interesting territory.

What if Padme's mental state deteriorated after the birth of the twins instead of merely dying? To see her fall into an inescapable chasm of despair seems to be a much more potent means of ending her arc than merely killing her. In fact, this coupled with Emperor Palpatine still informing a newly born Darth Vader that he had "killed her", seems to be a much more believeable, and tragic outcome for the doomed couple. Following this with perhaps dialogueless montages of Bail Organa & his wife raising Leia, leading to a delicate moment with the young princess peering into a near closed door only to see a dementia-riddled, broken elder Padme looking out of a sunlit window before being led away by one of many royal nannies, or a governess. The idea that she died a thousand deaths to a broken heart over time seems a lot more in keeping with the tone of a fantasy saga. It's just a mental image I still see to this day, and perhaps still apply to the Star Wars prequel in my mind. I've always loved the fairy tale's ability to plumb human depths with familiar imagery, and Padme Amidala's fall seems to make more storybook sense in this manner as opposed to merely dropping dead.

And the idea that Anakin now thinks she's dead. Crusher. (of course, some would argue that he would sense her to be still alive. I would argue that with his body in such a modified manner, I wouldn't put it past Palatine to place a block of sorts into his mind in order to keep the lie in place.) I'm looking at matters in regards to dramatic weight, and with canon well in mind.

The long and short, the Star Wars prequels do have their values, albeit in ways perhaps George Lucas and cohorts mever expected. Despite their kaleidoscope array of flaws, they do offer more than mere bombast and misguided writing. They offer us a chance to share discourse, and to work out what it is we love about our collective mythology. it challenges what we know, versus what we are longing for. And perhaps this alone is a legacy worth blogging about.


  1. and all this makes me think...

    "my god... those prequels sucked so bad. did they even try?"


  2. Well much like Mr. Plinkett mused, It was as if he wrote up a single draft on a legal notepad, and everyone went for it thinking there was no way it could go wrong.

    Something I've learned over the course of my years...Writing is rewriting.